We’ve all heard the old saying, ‘You don’t know who your true friends are until you’re down’.
Recently, my in-laws lost their home and all its contents in an accidental house fire. They are both 72 years old and are finding the whole process of being displaced, dealing with the insurance company, and simply re-building their lives, very stressful and overwhelming.
Backstory: my family (my husband, myself and our two kids), my in-laws, and my husband’s brother’s family all live on the same 21 acre mini farm ( different houses, of course). For the past eleven years that my husband and I have been married, we have tried to remain quiet and to ourselves, and help the other family members whenever we could, i.e., mow their yards, help clean their homes, plant flowers and do their landscaping. Anything that needs to get done, my husband and I and my two kids are always ready to help without the expectation of anything in return. We always try to do what God wants us to do, not always what we necessarily want to do. Nonetheless, we do it.
My husband’s brother and his family are quite the opposite, they are users. My brother-in-law didn’t raise his kids, he let my in-laws raise his son, never buys his kids anything, not clothes, not food, won’t even pick him up from school- he makes my in-laws pick him up because he ‘doesn’t have enough gas’, or some other lame excuse. He takes all of my in-law’s money, manipulating them by saying he is going to lose his house, or anything else he can come up with, and they freely give it to him. He calls my husband any chance he can to curse him and we have only been nice to this family. We have let them walk all over us and always try to keep the peace. Oh, and did I mention that he and his wife are alcoholics and that he doesn’t work? And did I mention that if my husband ever needed to borrow a single dollar that my in-laws always say they don’t have it?
Since my in-laws raised my brother-in-law’s son, he is obviously their favorite grandchild and they buy him everything to the point that he is ruined. He is a lazy boy, 15 years old, won’t help do anything, and his grandparents buy him the best of everything, he has a race car and they just bought him a new truck and he isn’t even old enough to drive.
Keep in mind that my two kids, 9 and 10 years old have to witness all of this because we live so close and, to put it bluntly, they aren’t stupid. They basically buy my kids nothing and these two precious kids are their grandkids too.
Back to the recent fire: do you think my husband’s parents went to stay with my husband’s brother’s family? No they did not. No, they stayed with us. Do you think his brother or their beloved grandson has lifted a finger to help in any way with the clean-up, paperwork, did any inventory? No, they have not. Do you think when the advance check from the insurance company came that we were paid for our help which we did not expect anyway? No, we did not. Do you think that the brother was there to get most of the money to fund his sons race car or to save his house from being foreclosed on when his parents received their insurance money? Absolutely YES! What a shame. Pathetic comes to mind.
So, what would you do if your parents played such obvious favoritism, besides move, because that is not an option right now. Is this happening to you and your family and if yes, how do you handle it?
I am so interested to read your comments.
Until next time, whatever the circumstance, THIS IS THE LIFE!